exploring Room

Ranier Rilke in writing to a friend said, ”Only he who can expect anything, who does not exclude even the mysterious, will have a relationship to life greater than just being alive...if we liken the existence of the individual to a room of larger or smaller size, it is evident that most people are familiar with only a corner of their room... in that they have a certain security. Yet every uncertainty fraught with danger is so much more human. It is the same uncertainty that motivated the prisoners in Poe's stories to explore the form of their terrible prisons and not be a stranger to the unspeakable horrors of their presence their.
But we are not prisoners... and there is nothing that should frighten or torture us.”

I am made to feel quite the fool when I realize how much I am holding onto my corner of the room for dear life. Because I really know I enjoy life better when I explore the rest of the room, expecting anything. Uncertainty fraught with danger is more human. And to expect anything means letting go of everything.

There is something that happens, though, as I explore…

my relationships grow deeper, with people, with God. The one I am “married” to becomes all I need or want… and thus I am more human, and less frightened or tortured.

Mat Kearny probably never intended it as such, but in his song “All I Need” are words that resonate with all this: “If everything we’ve got is slipping away, I meant what I said when I said until my dying day. I’m holding on to you holding on to me, maybe it’s all gone black but you’re all I see… maybe it’s all we got but it’s all I need. “
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